Tag Archives: Football

Reason #140 – My Dad…AGAIN

I was in the city for an exam and Dad was in the city drinking with colleagues so I agreed to meet him at the bar and he’d drive me home.

My Dad was introducing me to everyone when he got to a boy about my age he stopped. He placed his hand on my shoulder and nodding at the boy said, “this is a Fulham supporter. You’re a Norwich supporter. Incompatible…Now that’s out of the way, this is Tom.”


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Reason #135 – Football Boots

As previously mentioned, I love football. I’m English, it’s basically my religion.

As I have also previously stated, I have OCD which means I have little quirks like I can’t wear odd socks.

Now usually my OCD has no effect on my enjoyment of football, until Puma decided to do this:

Picture of Puma's pink and blue boots

*eye twitch* WHY!!!!!!

These are the boots Puma designed for the Fifa 2014 World Cup. Now, knowing that I can’t wear socks that are even the slightest bit different, how do you think I feel about a pair of boots that are two totally different colours?!

Yep. I basically sit there, eye twitching, teeth grinding, muttering (and ok, occasionally yelling) about how much I hate Puma (with the occasional “FUCK YOU PUMA” thrown in there for good measure). I really struggled to watch the World Cup because of this. I had hoped these boots would be limited to the two weeks of the World Cup and when Premier League returned I would be safe to watch again. That’s when Puma decided to design some boots just for their sponsored Arsenal players:

Puma's odd Arsenal boots

Puma’s stupid special Arsenal boots

And Mario Balotelli also moved to Liverpool and insisted on continuing to wear his pink and blue boots.

I rant about this a lot and I spend much of a game or highlights show telling players to wear boots that are the same colour (if it’s live TV they can totally hear me!) It doesn’t help when the person watching with me (in this case my Dad) decides to further enrage me by shouting out things such as “did you see that? He hit it with his pink boot.” *GLARE*

Thank you Puma for ruining football for me and also inspiring me. I now plan to run for Fifa president purely so I can introduce a rule that says players are only allowed to wear plain black boots, with black laces, and a black or white sponsor logo.

Picture of blue and pink Puma boots in half blue and half pink box

They even come in a stupid box!!

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Reason #111 – This will make me sulk for the rest of the day

So this happened and I plan to spend the rest of the day sulking about it, apologies in advance to my date today.




GIF of Suarez's second goal

Don’t let the ball bounce!!!

GIF of Suarez's third goal

That’s it, I give up!

In case it wasn’t obvious, my team is the one WITHOUT Suarez….

And he had to score a fourth one in the second half, just to rub salt into the wounds.

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Reason #102 – I thought it was a good idea for a date…

If you read my last post, I had a boy over to watch a football (EPL) match with me.

Yep. That’s my idea of a date.


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Reason #19 – It’s football!

I’m English but I now live in Australia. 

I say football and when I say football I am referring to what Australians (and Americans) call soccer (it’s that game where you actually use your feet.) 



I like to watch live football. I like to yell when watching live football (because if it’s live there’s a chance they might hear me…even if they’re on the other side of the world.) 

You may watch football with me but you may only speak about the game and if I yell “foul” or “penalty” you are expected to agree with me.

If we you need to speak to me about something other than football, it can wait until half time or the end of the game. (Unless you need to tell me the house is on fire and I need to get out, you can interrupt for that.)

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